Comments on: Listening Differently http://talkeezeblog.talkingforpeace.com/2008/03/17/listening-differently/ Be the change you want to see in the world - Sun, 05 Sep 2010 11:06:39 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.2.1 By: Charlotte http://talkeezeblog.talkingforpeace.com/2008/03/17/listening-differently/#comment-83 Charlotte Mon, 19 May 2008 10:31:23 +0000 http://talkeezeblog.talkingforpeace.com/2008/03/17/listening-differently/#comment-83 I agree that it is harder with younger children to talk as you would to a teenager who is capable of doing things themselves. Young children often want to be treated as an adult when they are simply not able to be treated as one. I can imagine that the eldest son of the lady above feels that they want to be treated differently to that of the younger child and so shows this frustration through anger. I hope that you were able to tailor the idea to your son as I have seen that this way of talking does have a positive effect! I agree that it is harder with younger children to talk as you would to a teenager who is capable of doing things themselves. Young children often want to be treated as an adult when they are simply not able to be treated as one. I can imagine that the eldest son of the lady above feels that they want to be treated differently to that of the younger child and so shows this frustration through anger. I hope that you were able to tailor the idea to your son as I have seen that this way of talking does have a positive effect!

]]> By: Ellie http://talkeezeblog.talkingforpeace.com/2008/03/17/listening-differently/#comment-67 Ellie Sun, 06 Apr 2008 21:36:28 +0000 http://talkeezeblog.talkingforpeace.com/2008/03/17/listening-differently/#comment-67 Am responding to the above posting. To apply Words That Change Actions it would be good to get an example of a situation. So Step one is Observe: describe the situation as to what you saw and what you said in less than 40 words. We can then attempt to unpick a situation. We can do this as a thread here or via email. Ellie Am responding to the above posting. To apply Words That Change Actions it would be good to get an example of a situation. So Step one is Observe: describe the situation as to what you saw and what you said in less than 40 words. We can then attempt to unpick a situation. We can do this as a thread here or via email. Ellie

]]> By: Nicola http://talkeezeblog.talkingforpeace.com/2008/03/17/listening-differently/#comment-63 Nicola Sat, 22 Mar 2008 21:05:46 +0000 http://talkeezeblog.talkingforpeace.com/2008/03/17/listening-differently/#comment-63 I have two sons (3 and 5) but I dont think this approach works with younger children. Well, I havent had success with it, yet! My eldest frequently displays signs of being angry (often with me). My attempts at empathising with his anger result in more abuse. And, when I ask if he would like to tell me how he is feeling he does not have the maturity to tell me. (Either that, or he is just too stubborn to tell me!) I would welcome suggestions for what I can say to him, for example, when he is yelling in my face that he 'cannot do x y or z on his own' and 'that is why he is asking me to do it for him' as I am gently trying to encourage indepence. Bing his mother, of course I think I know what he is feeling and what his needs are (!). He is feeling frustrated that he cannot do something for himself and needs reassurance that I am there to do it for him until he can. But how do I request him to do something, in such a way that does not result in us both yelling at each other and me ultmiately giving in to get the result necessary. TIA Nicola I have two sons (3 and 5) but I dont think this approach works with younger children. Well, I havent had success with it, yet!

My eldest frequently displays signs of being angry (often with me). My attempts at empathising with his anger result in more abuse. And, when I ask if he would like to tell me how he is feeling he does not have the maturity to tell me. (Either that, or he is just too stubborn to tell me!)

I would welcome suggestions for what I can say to him, for example, when he is yelling in my face that he ‘cannot do x y or z on his own’ and ‘that is why he is asking me to do it for him’ as I am gently trying to encourage indepence.

Bing his mother, of course I think I know what he is feeling and what his needs are (!). He is feeling frustrated that he cannot do something for himself and needs reassurance that I am there to do it for him until he can. But how do I request him to do something, in such a way that does not result in us both yelling at each other and me ultmiately giving in to get the result necessary.

TIA

Nicola

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